I’ve recently watched the movie The Jones’ and it really brings up a lot of issues surrounding consumerism and it’s impact on people at the collective and individual levels.
The story centers on people who work in “stealth advertising”,
a concept that is, really, thoroughly disturbing.
You really get a sense of how advertising can feed existing aspirations of status and a desire for belonging.
Personally, I’ve always been a more quality over quantity kind of person.
I’ve gone without buying a pair of jeans for years because I couldn’t find the ones that were just right.
I’d rather not buy it if it’s not exactly so.
On the other hand, when I do find the perfect pair,
I have no qualms about throwing down five hundred bucks for them.
Just my personality.
Quality over quantity.
Despite the fact that I don’t really buy much compared to most people I know,
I still decided that it was time for me to reflect on my relationship with stuff. All stuff.
However, let me get this out of the way first:
Shopping is not morally bad.
Liking nice things is not bad.
Splurging on nice things for yourself that you don’t necessarily need is not bad.
This is not a post that is meant to categorize spending as positive or negative.
However, I believe we really need to practice consciousness in this area of our lives.
It can’t hurt right?
One way to represent consumerism (or excessive spending) is through the Buddhist metaphor of the hungry ghost.
The hungry ghost has a large belly and a tiny mouth, so it never feels full after it eats and is perpetually “empty”.
When we always feel like buying bigger, better, newer, and prettier things, we are not feeling satisfied with what we have in our bellies, so like the hungry ghost we are always feeling empty.
Of course this metaphor becomes much more complex when we start contemplating the internalized beliefs we have about what “stuff” will provide for us. (Happiness, contentment, satisfaction, admiration…)
It’s a vicious cycle that can grow and grow without us even noticing it.
When it comes down to it, you know yourself and your life best.
But sometimes it can be helpful to ask yourself some reflective questions to clarify your relationship with money and spending.
{Note: There are no right or wrong answers to these.}
What is important is just to reflect on them for a bit. It’s about being more mindful and conscious with our spending.
Especially when the whole world is asking us to buy everything during the holiday season.
- Are there times when you go shopping because you feel bored, unhappy, stressed, or to unwind? (Spending can create a temporary positive change in mood.)
- How do you feel when you buy something? Right before, during, and after buying? (Sometimes people can be hyper-stimulated while spending. Almost experiencing a “buzz” or “high” while shopping.)
- How do possessions affect your view of yourself? Do you feel down when you can’t afford something someone else has? Does it impact you personally? (This really comes down to your personal beliefs.)
- What do you think would happen if you were able to purchase it? (It can seem like there is some perfect purchase out there that will magically make everything better. Not so much. Doesn’t exist.)
- Have you thought about how the media might have impacted your thoughts about spending and possessions? Car commercials with happy families, beer commercials with hot people at exciting parties…What kind of messages might have been internalized over the years?
What are some things that help you to stay conscious when spending during the holidays?